I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
