I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
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