So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
only you would photoshop your dick
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Randomize
