It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Will exercising make me less horny?
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