he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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