Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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