Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
