I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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