So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
The power of my boobs compel you
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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