so that wasnt chicken after all
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize