Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
