Texts From Last Night

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  (302): View more from Delaware

  Nicole vs. Life

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  (302): Nicole vs. Life http://tfl.nu/qzfl
  Replies (16) Good night (699) Bad night (984)
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do

  (1-319): View more from Iowa

  put a dollar in it?

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  (319): umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do (1-319): put a dollar in it? http://tfl.nu/6gdy
  Replies (14) Good night (1299) Bad night (4617)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.

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  (216): We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me. http://tfl.nu/rmif
  Replies (15) Good night (2645) Bad night (729)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore

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  (617): i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore http://tfl.nu/4xlx
  Replies (21) Good night (1465) Bad night (4582)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?

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  (301): I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus? http://tfl.nu/vinz
  Replies (20) Good night (4260) Bad night (1007)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school

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  (425): couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school http://tfl.nu/94oh
  Replies (36) Good night (6676) Bad night (1606)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.

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  (281): I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely. http://tfl.nu/tovx
  Replies (16) Good night (4906) Bad night (993)
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  (209): View more from California

  We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem

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  (209): We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem http://tfl.nu/pftr
  Replies (31) Good night (3354) Bad night (1287)
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  (361): View more from Texas

  Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.

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  (361): Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck. http://tfl.nu/rgty
  Replies (18) Good night (1596) Bad night (2105)
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  (916): View more from California

  No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.

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  (916): No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace. http://tfl.nu/5hw2
  Replies (12) Good night (1084) Bad night (2049)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.

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  (770): Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this. http://tfl.nu/8f5s
  Replies (3) Good night (1060) Bad night (485)
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  (646): View more from New York

  If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better

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  (646): If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better http://tfl.nu/zbhj
  Replies (3) Good night (1577) Bad night (981)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed

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  (717): if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen? (484): i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed http://tfl.nu/7o4k
  Replies (7) Good night (1131) Bad night (463)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse

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  (403): I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse http://tfl.nu/tdll
  Replies (2) Good night (301) Bad night (929)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo

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  (206): I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo http://tfl.nu/5god
  Replies (1) Good night (821) Bad night (268)

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