What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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