my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize