Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
