To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
