I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Randomize
