My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
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