I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dick lei will go down in squad history
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize