Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Randomize