walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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