I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
