wake up i wanna do it froggy style
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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