I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Randomize
