i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize
