You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
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