I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
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