get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
