He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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