yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
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