physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
