Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
