i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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