TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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