The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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