she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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