this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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