never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
