So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
