ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize