well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
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i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
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I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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