sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
