i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
