im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
