every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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