i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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