Quick, to the slutcave!
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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