i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
pray to the hookup gods
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
