What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
