It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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