yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
