It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize
