How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
tell me about the fingering
Randomize